When I started All Nation Restoration at 18, I kept hearing phrases like “we’re a family-run business”, “we treat our employees like family”, and “we’re a close-knit, family-oriented company.” These ideas were always presented as a badge of honor—a cultural strength. And at the time, that made sense. That was the only structure I understood. I came from a background where family was the lens through which everything was viewed, including leadership.
So I modeled my business after that idea. I wanted everyone to feel cared for, accepted, seen. I thought that was what made people stay. But around year five, I had a wake-up call.
The Fallacy of the “Family Business” Mentality
As much as we romanticize the idea of a family-oriented company, the truth is: family dynamics and business structure are fundamentally opposed.
In a family, you suffer together. You forgive, you tolerate, you show unconditional support—even when it’s not earned. You come together for birthdays, graduations, holidays. You prioritize emotional connection over performance. And while those values are noble in the home, they become liabilities in a business.
When you brand your company as a family, you subtly communicate to your employees that the difficult parts of the job—the stress, the structure, the discipline—are temporary. That they’re just something to “get through” before we get to the fun, like a family cookout after a long week. But business isn’t a weekend gathering. It’s a battlefield. And the enemy is inefficiency, unpredictability, and competitors who don’t operate with your blind spots.
Love Doesn’t Scale—Structure Does
What a business needs is not unconditional love—it’s clear structure. Not emotional forgiveness—but accountability. Not long-suffering acceptance—but alignment on goals.
You don’t win games by hugging it out in the locker room. You win games by training like hell, sticking to the playbook, showing up, and holding the line when it counts. That’s why companies need to be structured like teams, not families.
A team has:
And—most importantly—a common goal: to win.
When your company is a team, asking everyone to “wear the jersey” isn’t weird. It’s expected. And it builds identity, pride, and alignment around that shared mission.
The Trap of Personal Involvement
Early on, I thought being there emotionally for my team—helping them through personal crises, taking on the role of minister, friend, therapist—was a fair tradeoff for the shortcomings of my leadership. I hadn’t yet mastered financial systems, hiring, sales, or strategy, so I tried to “make up for it” with emotional generosity.
It didn’t work.
You can’t build a thriving business by failing at operations and overcompensating with mentorship. You’ll burn out, and your people will either become overly dependent or eventually resentful.
To My Younger Self—and to New Entrepreneurs
If I could speak to the version of me just starting out, I’d say this:
Stop calling your company a family. It’s not. It’s a team. Build it like one. Coach it like one. And lead it like your livelihood depends on it—because it does.
Focus on systems, not sentiments. Inspire respect, not dependence. Create clarity, not emotional confusion.
And as always:
Stay strong. Stay focused. Stay in business.
